Random Sightings

Location: Starbucks - Wellington/D'Aguilar, Central

22.00

A tall, handsome, well-coiffed man in a dark charcoal two-button suit moonwalks in front of a taxi. Michael Jackson won't be shaking in his raised hem lined-trousers any time soon.

22.05

Speaking of Michael Jackson, there's this crazy dude who walked around Lan Kwai Fong last week in two outfits. Dressed in a suit, he ran up to people in a black cape and a crazy jester-type mask. Then five minutes later he would show up wearing a fedora and a Michael Jackson inspired suit. This man's a chameleon. Now the dude's back, and just walked past the window wearing a Superman outfit, paired nicely with a pair of shiny black PVC boots. Unfortunately, the guy doesn't have the build, nor did he meet the prerequite 'downstairs.'

22.10

I'm still a daddy magnet. Enough said.

*bats eyelashes*

20.14

Bitch, you need to learn how to walk in three inch heels and a skin tight dress before you start weaving through Central traffic and jaywalking. You're a complete klutz in stilts. And bitch, your tits are about to fall out.

22.17

Walking around looking coy with a three-feet tall plush banana does not make you cute. You're in your 20s for Christ's sake.

Meanie RIP

A wise, handsome, loyal, and friendly cat.
May you rest in peace, my dear Meanie.

Meanie
1990 - 2006

Today's HK Sexually Ambiguous Persons Count

2

How Do You Solve a Problem Like Diarrhea?

Well, the inevitable has happened. I had my first mild case of traveller's diarrhea. No, I wasn't like a geyser 24/7, but I would have these sporadic cramps in my stomach which would lead me in making a mad dash for the nearest washroom. So when I first felt like something was up, I quickly ran through a list of things I have eaten. However, it would appear that all the food I've had was thoroughly cooked. Then I realised, it was probably from something else. Hi, note to self, when relatives constantly warn you about the local water, you should take heed and avoid a lot of things on the menu - namely iced beverages.

With my friend Audrea in town, we decided to go out and party it up at Lan Kwai Fong (Expats' and Hotties' HQ). So chances are I probably had too much to drink or I was chewing on some bad ice, which led me to the sorry state I'm in at the moment. It has seriously been a week, and I'm still feeling funny in the tummy.

It just bites that I can't drink from the tap. Every time when I brush my teeth, I rinse my mouth with water that tastes, well let's just say far from the glacial waters of Canada. It was kind of like rinsing your mouth in a public pool, hopefully with less p.p.m. of urine and other ungodly things that may float about.

And because of my icky GI system that refuses to retain water, I've had to sit out of some major partying. Bah.

I shall prevail damn it, and when I do I shall rightfully earn the title of Drunken Whore of Hong Kong.

But for now, my other throne awaits.

The Bus Uncle

This is not exactly news anymore, but I think it's entertainment still worth propagating to the masses.

For the past few weeks, there has been widespread media coverage on the "Bus Uncle" incident, involving a middle-aged man (Chan Yuet-tung) talking loudly on his mobile while on the bus, and a young man (Elvis Ho) who confronted him. The result was a one-sided loud altercation, and the entire row was captured on cameraphone by another passenger. This video was later uploaded onto youtube.com and has since been viewed millions of times. The incident also immediately spawned many spoofs by internet artists and also led to many t-shirts and mugs printed with certain catchphrases. I must have heard at least one of these phrases every day now on the MTR or in a restaurant. And everyday the papers have stories relating to this incident.

So for those of you who know Chinese, don't be distracted by the subtitles, as the English translations serve no justice to this colourful conversation. Absolutely priceless.

When Cherie sent me this last week, I was in absolute shock. I thought it was seriously the beginning of the end for civility.

Bus Uncle. Uncut and Uncensored.


I was reading the paper today and learned that the raging mad man had made three failed attempts at being elected the Chief Executive of the HKSAR. How sad it would be for Hong Kong to elect this man to be a statesman.

"You've got pressure? I've got pressure. Everyone has pressure!"

Wish you were here...

This is for Brad.



Harvey Nichols
The Landmark
Central